I can’t be the only one who loves making plans but hates following through with them. While you can’t cancel all the time, here are some believable excuses that won’t let anyone cut into your couch time.
- You had Chipotle for lunch and you’re fairly confident you have food poisoning.
- You’re doing a cleanse where you can’t have (e.g. dairy, gluten, alcohol…basically anything worth consuming.)
- Your poor pet is sick…of you leaving them alone all the time. Stay home for some much needed cuddles.
- You think you pulled a muscle in barre class and can barely walk. There’s no way you’d be fun hobbling down the streets or limping to and from bars.
- You have a terrible headache and are going to lie down for a bit. Apologize the next day for “falling asleep” but you feel much better now.
- You’re having an allergic reaction…to your friend’s BS reasoning.
- You’re balling on a budget and can’t afford to go out. If your friend insists on coming over and watching the Food Network with you, that’s Maid of Honor material right there.
- You lost your debit card and are waiting for a new one to arrive.
- Your credit card was stolen and your bank hasn’t reimbursed you yet.
- Uber prices are surging and you don’t feel like taking out a loan to make it into the city.
- You had a long week at work but you’d love to have brunch sometime. Bitches love brunch and while they’ll be disappointed in you cancelling last minute, you’re making it up to them with mimosas.
- You have to catch up on work because all you’ve been doing this week is doing Buzzfeed quizzes. At least you know what country you should live in based on your bagel preference.
- You already have a date…with your Netflix account. Don’t worry, you can always say the Tinder dude blew you off when they ask for juicy deets the next day.
- You might run into your ex. A true concern for anyone who lives in New England because we’re the epitome of “It’s a Small World.”
- Your roommate is having a crisis. What they don’t know if that she’s struggling to pick out an outfit.
- You’re already drunk at home and it’s not safe for you to make it out.
- The weather is going to be gross and everyone knows you melt in the rain.
- You have to catch up on sleep. You’ve only had 4 or 5 hours a night because you’ve been too busy rewatching Game of Thrones before the new season airs.
- You have to clean your place because your parents are visiting tomorrow. And by visiting you mean Facetiming your mom to show her your new purchases from TJ Maxx.
- There’s something wrong with your car and no, you don’t want anyone to go out of their way to give you a ride.
- You’re in the middle of doing laundry and your neighbors will take it out if you leave the machine unattended for 5 minutes.
Honesty is the best policy
- You guys literally just went out last weekend. That’s way too much human interaction for one month.
- You just don’t feel like it. Thanks but no thanks, you’re a grown adult and no one can guilt you into doing things you don’t want to do…except for your parents.
Question: What’s the wildest excuse you came up with to skip out on something?